Many of us have a hard time saying no, yet it is something we should embrace.
Sometimes we are brought up against something that challenges our core beliefs, something we feel to be wrong or at least harmful to us, and yet against our better judgment, we find ourselves saying yes to things we shouldn’t.
We find ourselves in this predicament due to fear. When it comes to saying no, fear of loss, rejection, not being liked, or the unknown can keep us from saying no when we know we should. These fears make for a dangerous cocktail of self-deception that can leave us upset and angry at ourselves when our intuition proves correct.
The laws of cause and effect ensure we attract situations that can challenge our growth as humans. When a situation raises any of these fears, our higher selves urge us to learn the power of standing our ground. And how do we stand our ground when faced with something we don’t want to do? We say no.
I recently had a situation where I said yes to a project I didn’t love. The script needed a lot of work, and much of it I had done for them in the form of suggestions. I wasn’t entirely sure about all the people involved as it was apparent they had no idea what they were doing and were really looking for me to fund their project.
They were not honest with me regarding how much financing they had secured, so I was beginning to have second thoughts about getting involved with them. This example is purely business; however, it demonstrates how your intuition is rarely wrong, and sometimes the answer is no.
After wasting a year’s worth of time entertaining the idea of working together, I felt resentful. Resentment tends to rear its ugly head when we do something against our judgment, often encouraged by another’s wants or wishes.
So I decided to cut them loose. After I chose to come from a place of NO rather than YES, I felt immediately relieved. I had convinced myself that in business, you must always come from a place of yes to avoid missing opportunities. After years of making the same mistake, I learned that this is NOT true in all instances.
While you definitely should say yes to everything you can that IS in your BEST interest, no is an equally powerful statement that must be utilized when the situation is not right. After all, life is all about balance.
I sent an email ending our relationship. I did so professionally, leaving the door open for future conversations should they be available for it or in a different place financially. Not surprisingly, my email was met with slight hostility and a petulant response proving that I was RIGHT to move on from that project.
Saying no should never overwhelm you with fear. It is one of the most self-empowering words we have at our disposal. Saying no to things not for our highest good, liberates us from becoming trapped by our fears. And once our minds master the root of fear, the road to success becomes wide open.